Why Kindness Is So Important

Why Kindness Is So Important

Why Kindness Is So Important

“Constant kindness can accomplish as much as the sun making ice melt. Kindness causes misunderstandings, mistrust and hostility to evaporate.” Albert Schweitzer

Kindness seems to be missing in today’s society. People are more connected to their devices than to what is happening around them. They are self-absorbed. Kindness is oftentimes the last thing they think about.

Without kindness, our world would be filled with strife, discontent, and anger. We’d see relationships fall apart or never start, countries disintegrate into constant war, and our world completely changed.

According to Dr. John and Julie Gottman – founders of the Gottman Institute, which studies relationships – every successful relationship is, in the end, supported by kindness. What’s more, they claim the most important time you should be kind is during some type of conflict, such as when you are arguing with a partner and yet, this is the hardest time for most people to be kind.

“Kindness is about showing empathy, acceptance, and tolerance,” explains Lawrence Stoyanowski, a Vancouver-based therapist. “It’s about being able to scan your partner for things to appreciate rather than criticize.” Stoyanowski follows the principles set out by the Gottman Institute.

Why Kindness

As children and even as adults, we look for kindness from our family and friends. We give and receive kindness every day in some form.

Kindness moves us.

We remember past kindnesses done to and by us.

Kindness nourishes, heals, strengthens, and uplifts us.

Many studies have shown that kindness though, is not only a good moral value but it is good for you. It benefits your brain, your body, and your emotions in many ways. It is a foundation for a meaningful life.

Why Kindness Is So Important
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Kindness nourishes, heals, strengthens and uplifts us.

Here are 6 reasons why kindness is so important.

  1. Kindness makes us happier. When we perform random acts of kindness, we activate areas of pleasure, social connection, and trust in our brains.
  2. It creates a positive loop in our minds. Kindness makes you happier and happiness makes you kinder. When you are happy, you are more likely to feel giving and kind towards others.
  3. Kindness can create social connections and bonding. As humans, we’re preprogrammed to be a part of a group. Being a part of a group, a social connection of some type enhances our physical performance and boosts mental clarity. Being kind allows us to be a part of a group.
  4. Kindness helps with the healing process. When healthcare is delivered with kindness it can hasten the healing process, thereby shortening hospital stays. Kinder care leads to a range of outcomes including reduced pain, lowered blood pressure, and less anxiety for the patient and caregivers.
  5. Kindness can decrease or help prevent diseases. Kindness lowers our stress and anxiety levels and decreases pain because of the endorphins and feel-good hormones released at the time of the act.

No matter how inconsequential an act of kindness might be, it is good for you.

Without kindness, life would be lonely, filled with anger and desolation, disease, and stress. But when kindness is both given and received with no expectations in return, our lives are calmer, happier and we build meaningful connections to others.

What was the last act of kindness did you perform or receive?

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Living Abundantly By Showing And Sharing Gratitude

Living Abundantly By Showing And Sharing Gratitude

Living Abundantly By Showing And Sharing Gratitude

Would you like to live abundantly full of happiness and contentment? 🙋🏻‍♀️

How about a life with excellent physical and mental health? 🙋🏻‍♀️

You can greatly increase your chances of that happening by showing and sharing gratitude. Say what?

That’s right, something as simple as practicing thankfulness and expressing how grateful you are for the people and things you have in your life has a powerful impact.

Here are some simple things you can do starting today to show your gratitude.

 

  • Tell the people you love how grateful you are for them. We often take the ones closest to us for granted. I know I do this more often than I would like to. Make a point to show your appreciation regularly and be specific to make it meaningful.

 

  • Think about the people who challenge you. Express your gratitude for how they help you grow and make you stronger.

 

  • Take a few minutes each week to write a letter or email to a person who has made a difference to you at one point or another. This could be a teacher, a mentor, an old friend … anyone you can think of.

 

  • Give the gift of your time to someone to show without words how grateful you are to have them in your life. We are limited to what we can do in person, but a phone or video call I feel would suffice at this time. This is particularly important for elderly people in your life. Your time with them is limited. Make the most of it.

 

  • Start using a gratitude journal and make the time to write down three things you are grateful for every single day. It will brighten even your worst days and put things into perspective. Need a journal? Visit my Resource Library for a FREE Fall Journal!
Living Abundantly By Showing And Sharing Gratitude
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Give the gift of your time to someone to show without words how grateful you are to have them in your life.

  • Forgive yourself when you don’t reach all your goals, or things don’t go your way. Be grateful for what you have and what you are learning from each experience.

 

  • Compliment the people around you. Make them feel good about themselves. It’s a powerful way to show gratitude in an indirect way. Small, meaningful gifts and acts of service do the same.

 

  • Pay it forward. Do something nice for someone you work with or a total stranger. Random acts of kindness are a wonderful way to spread gratitude and bring more positivity into the world.

 

  • Give a hug (or elbow bump if we are still in this pandemic) and a kind word to someone who’s struggling. Show them through physical affection that you’re there for them and grateful to have them in your life.

 

  • Show your body and mind gratitude for what they do for your day in and day out by taking care of yourself and investing in regular self-care.

I’ll leave you with a quote. Take a moment to read it, re-read it, and really let it sink in.

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” – William Arthur Ward

Join me on Instagram as I shared 7 days on why you should make gratitude a daily focus. Looking forward to connecting with you!

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The World Outside Is Chaotic And Stressful – How To Find Peace and Joy Within Yourself

The World Outside Is Chaotic And Stressful – How To Find Peace and Joy Within Yourself

The World Outside Is Chaotic And Stressful – How To Find Peace and Joy Within Yourself

It’s difficult to imagine a world more chaotic than the one we live in today.

It seems as though it’s a never-ending slew of bad news, misinformation, and life just gets harder.

Modern living has introduced extra pressure and there is a lot of responsibility that brings insecurity and anxiety.

It’s difficult to imagine finding peace and joy within yourself when you’re swirling around in all that chaos.

But you can.

By learning to stay cool, calm, and collected in the most high-pressure, intense moments you will find it easier to identify the silver lining in every situation you find yourself.

No matter the circumstances or the situation, you have the ability to stay calm. You’re going through some tough patches row right now, but no matter the obstacle, you will get there in the end.

It’s all about learning how to respond efficiently to discover peace.

There are signs that show up when you are approaching your breaking point. However, to recognize those signs you have to be prepared to be honest.

When you are faced with pressure, stress, negativity, and anxiety, your body sends you signals. Your body is shouting at you, telling you to slow down and take a break. It might be a painful process, but it’s one that is worth it.

If you do not get control of the chaos in your life, you will experience an impacted mental state, poor sleep, a lowered immune function, or a decline in your physical health. This inability to control these emotions can also negatively influence friendships, romances, and potentially create a dip in intimacy.

Stress and chaos cause us to disconnect from ourselves, physically and mentally, unless we gain control.

Let’s talk about how!

Remain Calm

When you live amid chaos, it’s difficult to find the light at the end of the stretching darkness in the tunnel. However, it might not be apparent, but it is absolutely inevitable.

There is always a golden sky at the end of a storm. Behind those clouds, there is the sun, the light. It takes work to reach the light, but it starts by learning how to remain calm.

The World Outside Is Chaotic And Stressful – How To Find Peace and Joy Within Yourself
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Your breath matters more than you realize.

One Step Back

Negative situations are adept at sucking us in and making us obsess. When it happens, it becomes easy to allow us to encompass our thoughts and feelings. Humans love self-fulfilling prophecies.

You have to avoid this situation by taking one step back. When it all falls apart, you have to slow down and give yourself room to breathe. We are so quick to want to fix things and move past the chaos. Too often we want to respond quickly because life seems to come at us so fast.

Take a deep breath. Take your time and put some space between you and the tough stuff.

One Deep Breath

Your breath matters more than you realize. When you’re dealing with something difficult and pay attention to your breathing, you will notice it’s shallow. It doesn’t just keep you alive, breathing can keep you calm and help you find inner peace.

You can use deep breathing in the moment, but it’s a practice you can start before bed each evening. I like to practice my deep breathing during stressful moments. It all starts with one deep breath. You will feel calmer and lighter when you practice deep breathing and that is the start of finding inner peace and joy.

One Set Routine

A routine is more than organizing your morning, so you arrive to work on time. It provides security and stability as you map out your day.

Having a morning routine allows you to positively set the tone for the entire day ahead of you. You can gain a sense of purpose and empowerment by engaging in a particular ritual each day because you are making proactive decisions on how to get things started and the activities you choose can aid in producing that mindset.

Let routine be your anchor in a sea of chaos.

One Stress Point

Start by identifying one stress point. We all have unique stressors and identifying them can help you develop the right way to deal with them. For now, it starts with one and from there, you can explore.

Life might be chaotic, but that doesn’t mean it has to overwhelm your peace and joy. You can find calm despite the mess swirling outside your window.

If you want to start looking at the bright side of things, join my FREE 7-day Finding the Good When Things are Bad Mini Challenge!  Each day you’ll get an email from me with a tip or a strategy designed to help you make the best of things in a world of uncertainty.

 

 

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Simple Strategies for Overcoming Negative Feelings

Simple Strategies for Overcoming Negative Feelings

Simple Strategies for Overcoming Negative Feelings

Everybody experiences negative feelings in their lifetime. 

Whether you are prone to negative thinking, or you’re suffering negative thoughts after a crisis, it’s crucial to learn how to deal with them effectively.

The sooner you control those negative thoughts, the less impact they’ll have on your life. If you’re struggling to let go of negative thinking, below you’ll discover some simple strategies you can try.

Addressing your feelings

The first step to overcoming negative feelings is to address them. It’s tempting to bottle up negative emotions, hoping they’ll simply subside on their own. However, this very rarely happens. In fact, bottling up negative emotions can cause them to worsen.

Therefore, it’s important to address your feelings. Write them down and analyze them. What is causing the feelings and how is it impacting your life? The simple act of writing down how you feel can make it seem easier to manage.

This is why I believe so heavily in using a journal. There are no rules to follow when you start a journal. You write as much or as little you desire. The important thing is that you just start. Check out my blog post, How to Get Started Writing a Journal for helpful tips!

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When you start to introduce more positivity into your life, it’s going to help reduce those negative feelings.

Confide in someone you trust

It’s also common to try and deal with negative emotions by yourself. I tend to keep them inside because I am ashamed and embarrassed of my feelings. However, if you share your feelings with someone you trust, it can minimize them and help you overcome them.

The popular saying “A problem shared is a problem halved” can prove true in times of crisis. Remember, you aren’t alone in this. By opening up, you may find others feel the same way. This can make you feel much less alone and better able to combat negative feelings.

Simple Strategies for Overcoming Negative Feelings

Look for the positive

This may not be the easiest strategy, but it’s definitely effective. Negative feelings often come from feeling helpless and seeing only the negative in a situation. So, looking for something positive after a crisis, it can help minimize those negative feelings.

Every challenging situation we go through can teach us something positive. It could be identifying something you can do to better handle the situation if it ever crops up again. Or, you could focus on what you’ve learned throughout the crisis.

If you can find just one positive thing, it’s going to make a huge difference in how you feel.

Remove negative sources from your life

In order to focus on the positives, you’re going to need to get rid of the negatives in your life.

So, think about the top three negative sources in your day to life. This could be social media, people, or a particular part of your daily routine.

Once you’ve identified where your negativity typically comes from, you can then think of ways to reduce it during the week. For example, you could endeavor to spend less time on social media each day. If it’s people bringing you down, spend less time with them, and focus on surrounding yourself with more positive people.

When you start to introduce more positivity into your life, it’s going to help reduce those negative feelings.

Write down your thoughts and feelings

We mentioned earlier that bottling up negative feelings can cause them to get worse. For this reason, a great tip to overcome them is to write down your thoughts and feelings.

This is especially ideal for those who feel uncomfortable talking about their feelings. Writing them down can help to get them out of your head and help you identify ways to manage them.

By writing down thoughts and feelings, it gives us the opportunity to better understand them. This in turn allows you to recognize when you are experiencing them, and what you can do to counteract them.

These are some of the best strategies you can use to overcome negative feelings. Addressing them and taking steps to understand them will greatly help with your ability to handle negative emotions.

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Becoming More Mindful By Slowing Down on Immediate Gratification

Becoming More Mindful By Slowing Down on Immediate Gratification

Becoming More Mindful By Slowing Down on Immediate Gratification

Immediate gratification is defined as the desire to experience fulfillment without delay.

In today’s world, it’s more attainable than ever. Some common instances of how some people allow themselves immediate gratification are with food, shopping and entertainment. It’s human nature to want something good and not want to wait for it.

But, there’s such a thing as too much of a good thing.

 

In today’s world, it’s more attainable than ever. Some common instances of how some people allow themselves immediate gratification are with food, shopping and entertainment. I

Being conscious of how much immediate gratification we allow ourselves and then slowing down on it has some perks. If we take the time to ask ourselves what we really need and want and if we’re willing to wait for it, we can become more mindful and productive.

Too Much Food

Overconsumption of food, as well as the type of food Americans, tend to reach for is a common topic in the US. Almost all of us are guilty of it. After a long day at work or taking care of our kids, it’s often easier to stop at the fast-food drive-thru for dinner.

But, just as well known as these facts are, it’s as well known that fast food type foods aren’t good for us.

Instead of the immediate gratification of the easy meal, we can make the mindful decision to choose our health. All it will take is a little planning ahead to have a healthy and satisfying meal already prepared at home.

By consciously choosing to not give in to the immediate gratification some foods provide, we will be healthier.

Overspending

Shopping is another way people achieve immediate gratification. It feels good to buy something that we want, or that is a good deal. With the boom of online shopping it’s as easy as a click away.

Do we really need all of these “things”? Simply being mindful of spending habits can help save money.

Financial stability is more important than the “next new thing”.

Becoming More Mindful By Slowing Down on Immediate Gratification
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Do we really need all of these “things”? Simply being mindful of spending habits can help save money.

Likes and Follows

Entertainment is immediate too. Almost everyone has a smartphone.

The internet is at our fingertips at all times. It’s not uncommon for people to be on their phones constantly checking social media sites or playing on gaming apps. If we are able to put the phones and computers down and actively engage, we will build stronger, more meaningful, productive relationships.

By being mindful of our urges for immediate gratification, we can curb them. We can take a front seat in decisions that affect our lives.

Immediate gratification is so easy, especially in this day and age. But, easy is not always best in the long run

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Changing Your Mindset: Attitude is Everything

Changing Your Mindset: Attitude is Everything

Changing Your Mindset: Attitude is Everything

Keeping a positive outlook can be a struggle during times of uncertainty and understandably so. It’s easy to feel surrounded by doom and gloom when you’re virtually sequestered. Making things even more difficult is the constant flood of information coming from the news and social media sites.

It’s important to take your mental health seriously, and for me, mindset seems to be the key.

Changing Your Mindset: Attitude is Everything

There are two camps out there when it comes to mindset during challenging times. Some people are able to focus on the positives, while others seem to be more challenged to keep a productive, positive mentality. [I’m raising my hand with the latter.]

Changing Your Mindset: Attitude is Everything
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Sometimes something as small as what you’re wearing can make all the difference in how you feel.

New Way of Living

This “new normal” that we’re facing comes along with all sorts of new ways of living. Attitude can really be everything when it comes to a healthy mindset.

We are asked to change our behavior and how we interact with others. This can feel isolating. But, as parents and caregivers, what about thinking of it as an opportunity to spend much-needed quality time with your immediate family.

Changing Your Mindset: Attitude is Everything

Maybe you find yourself trying to balance zoom calls and home with the kids. You could give in to the frustration and let it stress you out. Or you can use this extra time spent with your children and bring the family closer.

Try making it a fun experience to remember!

Not all learning is done in the classroom or behind a computer screen. How about taking the kids outside for a nature walk to collect leaves or flowers and then label them. Or, try baking cookies or cooking dinner. Using recipes is a good way to explore new math skills.

There are plenty of resources out on the internet for fun, active learning ideas.

Technology Cleanse

Another way to keep positive is to try and unplug. Before you balk, hear me out. It’s necessary to take a conscious step back from the tv or computer screen. Try not to let yourself be inundated with negative news 24/7.

Remember, there are still good things happening in the world. Maybe search for some funny cat videos to watch, or hop on a video call with friends and family.

Do something to make yourself smile.

Mood Makeover

Sometimes something as small as what you’re wearing can make all the difference in how you feel. Even if you’re working from home now, getting up and getting dressed as if you were headed to the office, may give that needed mood boost and positive motivation.

Achieving a positive outlook can be as simple as daily positive affirmations. Find what works best for you.

Giving yourself a mood-makeover is something we can all do to help ourselves stay focused on the positives during this time of uncertainty. Remember, no one is perfect.

So, if you feel yourself starting to slip into negative thinking patterns, try making a conscious effort to rearrange your mindset.

A positive attitude can go a long way!

Technology Cleanse

Another way to keep positive is to try and unplug. Before you balk, hear me out. It’s necessary to take a conscious step back from the tv or computer screen. Try not to let yourself be inundated with negative news 24/7.

Remember, there are still good things happening in the world. Maybe search for some funny cat videos to watch, or hop on a video call with friends and family.

Do something to make yourself smile.

Mood Makeover

Sometimes something as small as what you’re wearing can make all the difference in how you feel. Even if you’re working from home now, getting up and getting dressed as if you were headed to the office, may give that needed mood boost and positive motivation.

Achieving a positive outlook can be as simple as daily positive affirmations. Find what works best for you.

Giving yourself a mood-makeover is something we can all do to help ourselves stay focused on the positives during this time of uncertainty. Remember, no one is perfect.

So, if you feel yourself starting to slip into negative thinking patterns, try making a conscious effort to rearrange your mindset.

A positive attitude can go a long way!

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